Let us work on being united

By K.L. Huntley
Reader Contributor

I always loved the story of the young people participating in the Special Olympics in Seattle almost 50 years ago. It was the 100-yard dash, the gun went off and the runners eagerly started toward the finish line. One of the younger kids stumbled halfway, fell and began to cry. The other “competitors” stopped in their tracks and, to the amazement of the crowd, they all turned and went back to the side of their fallen comrade. 

The youngster was lifted by his peers, kissed and then, much to the surprise of the onlookers, all the runners linked arms and proceeded as one unit, crossing the line jubilantly together. It is reported that the fans simultaneously stood clapping and cheering for quite a while. It is also recorded that many of them were crying. 

More recently, there was a heartwarming incident during a softball game between Southeastern University and Grand View University of Des Moines, Iowa. The Southeastern team was ahead 4-1, however, the bases were loaded when Kaitlyn Moses of Grand View’s team, hit a grand slam. Kaitlyn ran to first base, but her ankle gave out and she collapsed before making it to second. It was then, to the astonishment of the onlookers, that two of the opposing team’s members went to Kaitlyn, lifted her and carried her across the remaining three bases tapping her non-injured foot lightly on each base as their rules demanded. 

Who were the winners and/or losers in each of these incidents? It appears in each story — both of which are true — that the winners were what we usually refer to as losers when you are looking at the scores. The richness and depth of their compassion, however, and their open display of caring in each incident placed them over the top of any number.

In both incidents, the “team” effort was not what the fans expected. What they witnessed, what transpired instead, was a bonding — a sense of belonging together that superseded society’s expectations at that given time and moment. All of these young people valued a great deal more than the score of the game. They quickly united, displaying for all to see what they held as a greater value.

And that brings us to the question of what exactly do we value? Most will say family, some their faith and a few, something entirely different. Values may be flexible but everyone needs to stop occasionally and take an inventory of theirs — perhaps narrowing it down to five. 

For the past three years in January, the Bonner County Human Rights Task Force, in partnership with the Bonner County public library, has held what is called a “Community Read.” The library has even gone so far as to procure multiple copies of the chosen title, not only to encourage folks to read the material but to make it easy on their budgets. Nothing can be easier than free. 

This year they chose the book Belonging, by Geoffrey L. Cohen. For me it was a bit of a slug to read; however, Mr. Cohen substantiated all his material by citing multiple case studies. The richness and expansion of thought came from the discussions both in the library and on Zoom. 

It was sad to hear that a few of the participants attending felt they did not belong there, but also expressed that they didn’t feel comfortable or safe anywhere in this area. 

The goals and values of the majority of individuals in Bonner County are similarly united, whether they are new migrants or locally born. They are united in their desire to live free of fear and secure in this spectacular environment. 

“United” is a great word. It means “in agreement.” It does not mean lockstep in and on every topic but it is the opposite of polarization, the taking of so-called sides or opposing teams. I have discovered how many people are actually helping unite our communities. 

The sheer number of volunteers in Bonner County is commendable. They can be found in the food banks, the schools and the thrift shops all set up to help. The churches are uniting in common goals whether it be soup kitchens or Meals on Wheels. And most of them could use more help.

Thanks to the BCHRTF and the library’s unification the first community book read was in January 2022 and they chose Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents, by Isabel Wilkerson. What I discovered right off the bat in that book is that the Third Reich — in its formative years — actually studied the United States to see how we, as a nation, could suppress and isolate whole cultures and still remain respected in the world. The Nazi’s they kept copious and accurate records, so Wilkerson could substantiate her writings. 

In 2023, two books were discussed: I Never Thought of It That Way, by Monica Guzman, and Between the Listening and the Telling, by Mark Yaconelli. What I came away with from that reading was that everyone — and I emphasize everyone — has their story. You don’t know if the surly checker at the market lost their parent or didn’t have breakfast that morning. Rarely do we know everyone’s story and the bottom line is continually to practice being kind — knowing we don’t know what the other individual is experiencing, regardless of their age. 

As we emerge from winter, I suggest we check our core values. Perhaps list them, and limit it to five. Let us try to listen and not pontificate. Is there something we can do to support them as a family, neighborhood or community? 

Bonner County has a plethora of places you can lend a hand. Look around and let us become united, creating an accepting and safe environment for all. Let us focus on the positive and avoid the negative. Let us bring back respect for everyone and not just give the words lip service. Learn to reach back, help another get up and move forward remembering the real winners are those who possess deep empathy, integrity and respect for all. 

The real winners are those quality individuals who work not only to benefit themselves, but strive additionally for the betterment of others — all the “others” in our stupendous community.